John Farnum Advises How to Manage Stranger Danger
What do you say and how do you act when a stranger disrupts your purposeful ambulation by asking you, “Do you have the time?” or “Hey, have you got a match?” or some other “come-on” to disorient you and possibly set you up to be victimized by a criminal act?
[ Read the SemperVerus article, Video: How to Manage a Stranger’s Approach and Maintain Self-Defense ]
John Farnam is president of Defensive Training International and has personally trained thousands of federal, state, and local law enforcement personnel, as well as private citizens, in the responsible use of firearms. In this video interview with the Armed Citizens Legal Defense Network, he offers strategic advice in safely disengaging from unwanted interaction with possible predators. Following the video below are highlights to remember.
Read the transcript or watch the interview here.
• You don’t answer questions….[T]he important thing is not to engage in a conversation. What you want to do is disengage and separate as quickly as possible….[N]ever stop moving. When the person approaches you do not ever stop moving. One of their tactics is to get you stopped so they can start a conversation. When possible, keep moving or if you’re not moving, start moving away.
[ Read the SemperVerus article, Don’t Be a Victim of Crime: Learn How to Refuse To Be A Victim® ]
• Instead of trying to make this up as you go along, you have standard tape loops. The one I recommend to students is very simple. We assume what we call the interview stance—put your hands in front of you to establish standoff distance as if to say, “You’re close enough”—and then we say something like, “I’m sorry, sir. I can’t help you.”….Don’t say anything a prosecutor later can claim, “You started a fight. You insulted them or you said something very unkind or disparaging.”
[ Read the SemperVerus article, Situational Awareness: What Do You See? ]
• [B]e courteous to everyone, friendly to no one….What is in your best interest is to disengage courteously but aggressively. Say, “I’m sorry, sir, I cannot help you. You have a nice day.”
[ Read the SemperVerus article, Active Self Protection Self-Defense Checklists and Acronyms ]
• In the 5% of the time [politeness] is unsuccessful, you’re probably going to have to escalate verbally….[G]o from, “Uh uh, I can’t help you,” to “Get away from me!” Say it very emphatically, as loud as you can. “Get away from me!” Once again, that’s done without threats to do something terrible; it’s just, “Get away from me!” or “Back off!” or something like that. That is verbal escalation. Normally, when you do that, they’re a little taken aback and you can take advantage of that to move out.
[ Read the SemperVerus article, “Most Terrorists Are Terrifyingly Normal,” Says Former Intelligence Officer ]
• When…you can’t get somebody out of your face, carry a can of OC (pepper spray)….You spray them in the face—that’s the only target that makes sense. It takes their breath away and burns and distracts them. While they’ve got other things to think about, you separate. They’re not going to die—there’s no permanent injury—it’s unpleasant…but it’s certainly not life-threatening, nor does it produce any kind of permanent disfiguration or damage. If you use pepper spray, you committed a battery, so once you get a safe distance away, you’ll probably want to call the police.
[ Read the SemperVerus article, Why Use and How to Choose Pepper Spray ]
• We should all carry a tactical flashlight—in excess of 500 lumens. There are various brands like Fenix, Streamlight, Surefire, Powertac, and FirstLight….If you can hit someone in the face with a beam of light, it has a very temporary paralytic effect….When you go to restaurants after dark, the parking lots are full of people who approach you. I usually do a verbal escalation with a light in my hand, and I’ll hit them in the face with the beam. They’ll put their hands up. I can see what’s in their hands and all they can see is orange balls for the next five minutes. I’ll say, “You have a nice day, sir,” and go into the restaurant. Nobody gets hurt. There’s no need to call the police because there’s nothing that could be described as a battery. We separate and no one gets hurt. That is the definition of a good outcome.
[ Read the SemperVerus article, Checklist: Categories and Their Items for Every Day Carry (EDC) ]
• [Attorney] Andrew Branca talks about [the five elements of self-defense law:] innocence, imminence, proportionality, reasonableness and the last one, probably the most important, is avoidance.
[ Read the SemperVerus article, The 5 Elements of Self-Defense Law ]
• [K]eep your head up and keep looking around. When they see that you’re alert and looking around, they’ll probably choose someone else. The people that are typically selected for victimization by mugging suspects are walking along with their head down, not paying attention to where they’re going.
[ Read the SemperVerus article, Situational Awareness: 14 Ways to Walk Like You Drive ]
• Driveways and parking lots are the most dangerous places in this country. Why? Because people aren’t paying attention. They’re fumbling with keys, they’ve got their arms full of stuff, and they’re not paying attention.
[ Read the SemperVerus article, Protect Yourself from a Carjacking ]
• In our society right now car theft is way down because new cars from the last couple of years are fundamentally impossible to steal when you don’t have the fob. It’s not going to start….[But] while car thefts are way down, carjacking is way up, because the only way to steal your car is to steal you, too. The closer you get to your car, the more dangerous it becomes. When you pull into a parking lot, get out of your car, and get away from it right away….When you approach your car, get in and get in motion immediately. Your safety is in motion. Get rolling. Do not sit in a car that’s not moving, particularly if you’re not paying attention. That’s very, very dangerous.
[ Get the SemperVerus booklet, The Case for Biblical Self-Defense ]
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